How can putting on make-up or wearing a pink jacket and accessories make me feel good - it can't. What really makes me feel good about myself is the act of respecting, love and making effort to take care of myself.
You see I didn't wake up looking like that, in fact, I felt less than confident when I saw my face in the mirror that morning. I really have funny times with my skin, especially this time of the month. My critical self-talk sees a pimple, bad hair and round belly and the fact that I fully accept myself doesn't mean that my self-critic is quiet.
But I decide to give myself some love. I see the effort of dressing in cute clothes and putting makeup as an expression of my femininity and self-respect which is a strength in itself.
Personal Style is a tool to bring my best, true self, to stand tall, hold my space and energy within. I don't have to post pictures without make up and in messy hair to prove my "real" me. The beauty is in your self-image, the value you assign to who you are. I understand my self-concept and do not follow the conventions. I say adorn your worth via graceful personal style, define your own style terms and create your own true version of who you are.
Now, some of you may think that media are pushing through the concept of what beauty is, that makeup free photos represent "real" beauty and so on. With all respect it is a bullshit...
Since when someone decides upon what my self-concept is? Very often we impose on ourselves the versions, concepts dictated not by the desire of our soul but by the vision from colourful magazines, social media and TV shows. Synthetic fashion creates synthetic desires, most likely not aligned with our true nature. It is like wearing clothes in a red colour which highlights all our imperfections only because trends say so.
People are often slaves of conventions..Someone told them they should be this or that, they should wear this or that and so on and they try to be this way till death, not knowing whom they were and really are.
I want to encourage you to be yourself, redefine what "being yourself" means to you. Here are some ideas on how you can embrace yourself through style.
- Add some make up. I am not saying 3 layers of make up to cover all your beautiful features. Add a bit of mascara, lipstick, light foundation that makes your skin glow a bit, feels fresh and make you feel younger and healthier. I appreciate there are many women who don't wear any make up because they think they will look like "dolls" etc and they may see makeup as something that kills their natural beauty... What can I say, redefine this, unless you feel amazing with a tired, makeup-free face. I think that unless you are 15 years old and have alabaster skin, no dark circles, glowing complexion, a bit of corrector or even highlighter, blusher brings your beauty out. Stay open-minded.
- Accessorize your personality. Express a little more of you via a statement necklace, a beautiful scarf, glasses, bags, fun tights, quirky shoes, headband, hats etc. I love simplicity with character. Simple, clean style with original, non-mainstream accessories. Don't be like everyone else, be unique and bold.
- Wear clothes that fit. The colour can be gorgeous and complement your natural skin tone, the fabric can make you feel amazing, the texture can be a pure genius BUT if the clothes don't fit you well-it all goes to the pot! Some women think that if they have their "colours" done they will suddenly look amazing, Wrong. It is not about the colour, it is about the fit, how you accessorize clothes, how you feel in your clothes, how you move and the energy you create when wearing clothes and the way you groom yourself too! It is better to look at how you instinctively feel in your clothes, observe how they drape on your body before you jump on buying something in right colour and nothing else than that. Always consider alterations, find a good tailor and make a measure tape your friend.
- Be playful, have fun! It is great to know all the fashion rules, but what is even better is to be smarter than them! I could never classify myself as any one particular shape. I was suggested to wear colours that I dislike and many dos and don'ts that I can allow myself now to not care about! Very liberating feeling that gives me a total control over what I wear and how I wear things. Your body shape is all about proportions and fashion is about finding shapes that fit those proportions perfectly. Style is not about following ill advice that tells you that you cannot wear round prints if you have this or that body shape..ehhh that's good for robots. What about cutting down this noise and focusing on yourself, your own body shape, own unique shape and proportions and then building knowledge to wear clothes you truly want because you know how to use tricks to make any shape and style work for you.
My experience with style, my own personal journey have taught me that dressing well when coupled with internal work gives you a way to express the beauty in you and show the world who you are. At the end of the day the most important person you want to impress, is YOU.
P.S If you feel confused and lost in your personal style, fed up with the noise out there, ill style advice, one page is telling you this, other page is telling you that and don't know whom to trust and what to buy, I can help you take this confusion away. Style is You, not just clothes, not just colours. If you want to kick start your journey to a happier you and a better self-image then get in touch and let's chat how you can make it happen.
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